To Whom it May Concern
I have been employed with J Industries as a “Stay at Home Mom” (from here on referred to as SAHM) now for over 12 years. When we initially developed the terms of my SAHM “Contract”, there was only one offspring under my care. Now, 12 years later, I manage not only the household, but 3 juveniles as well. It is only reasonable that since my responsibilities have grown 3 fold that we would now renegotiate the terms of my contract as a SAHM.
When I “signed” my first contract as a SAHM 12 years ago, I agreed to the following duties under the category of “Childcare”:
- Feeding: I will feed the child a minimum of 3 meals a day, plus a minimum of 2 snacks, including hydration (depending on the age of the youth, that hydration may only be available through fluids sourced directly from my body)
- Bathing: I agree to provide the child baths and/or showers at least every other day throughout the week, more on days that involve mud and other soiling.
- Healthcare: I will manage all healthcare for the juvenile, including doctor’s appointments, record keeping for all symptoms, medication administration and growth changes. I also agree to manage all bills and insurance claims related to such items.
- Clothing: I will ensure our offspring is dressed each day in relatively clean clothing that fits relatively well. Procuring new clothes and shoes also falls under my responsibility.
- Education: With my prior experience in the field of education, I will take special care to oversee the youngsters’ education. This will involve research and comparison of the top local schools as well as enrollment and all its requirements.I will be responsible for delivering the child to said institution with required supplies (including backpack, folders, pens, markers and the like) and all required sustenance. I will supervise all homework assignments, special events, conferences and anything that requires a sign-up sheet or volunteer.
- Transportation: I also consent to driving the youth to and from all other required events, including, but not limited to school, sports, playdates and church.
- Children’s Social Calendar: I will schedule all playdates, classes, birthday parties and any other extracurricular activities. The youngster’s social calendar also falls under the description of the following:
- Family Social Calendar: I agree to plan all events that require family attendance. Including, but not limited to: Dinner with friends and family, day trips to the zoo, the beach and museums and any other special activities.
- Holidays and Special Occasions: I commit to planning all events and activities relating to each holiday, birthday party or other special occasion. This will include purchasing of all goods, clothing and décor necessary to create a memorable occasion for everyone in attendance.
- Moral and Religious Upbringing: The most important of all my duties involves implementing the mission statement of J Industries throughout each day, teaching the child right from wrong and the love of aGod.
- Find My Replacement: If I am unable to perform any of the aforementioned duties, I agree to find a suitable replacement to fill in in my absence. The child will never be without care or transportation.
I also agreed, when being a SAHM became my “profession”, that I would manage the following household responsibilities:
- House Cleaning: Bathrooms, Kitchen, Vacuuming and Dusting, Occasional Trash and Recycling Duty
- Stocking the Supply Closet: Keeping the supply closet stocked with paper towels, toilet paper, cleaning supplies, napkins and toiletries for all family members including toothpaste, soap, face wash, sunscreen and any special creams or ointments for individual needs (see also: Childcare: Healthcare)
- Meals: Meal planning, grocery shopping and most of the cooking, as well as baking of all cookies and special occasion treats
- Laundry: Making sure that all the clothes get washed and put way in the appropriate locations
- Mail and Paying the Bills: Responsible for sorting through all mail that comes across my desk and paying the bills as required
- Home Decorating: Decorating and shopping for all items to make the house a home
This list, however long, is incomplete. There are many other duties that fall under my jurisdiction, but are not listed here. However, as I am sure you have noticed, many of my core responsibilities have been neglected after the introduction of our 3rd offspring and because of that, my performance has been severely lacking.
It has become clear to me that my terms of my contract are outdated and were based on the information available when I first accepted the position after the arrival of child #1. Therefore, I feel that it is time to renegotiate the terms of my SAHM contract as the structure of the team at J Industries has been altered and so have the duties that accompany it.
I am requesting a meeting with the executive board immediately to greatly reduce the job requirements categorized under household. While some days I will gladly work overtime to wash the dishes that have sat in the sink for several days, I will no longer feel guilty for not doing my “job” around the house, as cleaning and the like will no longer solely be under my jurisdiction. I will no longer feel like a failure as a SAHM because my house or the kids are unkempt. I have come to the conclusion that as a SAHM to 3 kids, I cannot do it all. Just. Can. Not. So I am no longer going to try.
While I sympathize that you will now be left to your own devices with some of the responsibilities of the household, I am willing to discuss other solutions that will meet the needs of J Industries. Possible solutions include dividing up any and all household duties more equally between every member of the team or hiring an outside employee. I am open to any and all viable solutions to the dilemma placed before you.
I have truly enjoyed my time caring for my 3 offspring thus far and I look forward to creating more opportunities for enjoyment in the future with these upcoming changes.
A Stay-at-home-Mom to 3